MEMPHIS, Tenn — One in three women and one in four men have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. Reports show domestic violence rises during the holiday season because of financial stress, increased alcohol use and limited access to shelters.
The YWCA of Greater Memphis is the largest shelter for survivors of domestic violence in Tennessee. The organization offers survivors a place to stay, educational services, and even after school transportation for kids. Many of the staff members are survivors themselves.
“They say hurt people, hurt people," Gwen Turner said. "But healed people, heal people."
Turner is one of those healed people. She is a domestic violence survivor working at the YWCA to help others leave a situation like the one she was in for 20 years.
“At the time that I was experiencing domestic violence, my partner was a pastor,” Turner said. “I’m a gospel singer as well. So the degree of shame that I was experiencing at that time — of course I did not want anybody to know. My parents didn’t know. A lot of times people don’t understand why people stay in these situations, but I tell people all the time, when there is a battle between the heart and the head, the heart wins when the head is telling you this is not a good thing.”
Shame is one of the main reasons Executive Director Marquiepta Odom says domestic violence stays hidden.
“We can ask that person you know are you okay if anything is going on, but nine times out of 10 they will not admit because of shame and other various reasons,” Odom said.
So far in 2023, the Memphis Police Department responded to more than 370 family incidents, according to the Memphis public safety map. A majority of the calls were for violating a protection order.
“What we try to do is help them get out of situations, provide that safe place, even if they need assistance with going to court,” Odom said.
“Statistics have shown us that one of the most dangerous times in the life of a victim of domestic violence is not while they’re there but when they plan to leave,” Turner said.
Memphis Police said 44 of the 375 homicides in Memphis this year have been domestic violence situations. If you’re a survivor of domestic violence, you are able to get shelter from the YWCA regardless of whether or not you have filed a report.
If you or someone you know needs help, you can text “start” to 88788. Additional resources can be found here.